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Posted

Sabres ... dulled.
Devils ... exorcised 
Blue Jackets ... given to Goodwill
Red Wings ... clipped
Ducks ... plucked
Flyers ... forgot their masks and vaccination cards and not allowed to board the aircraft 
Senators ... censured
Blackhawks ... down
Rangers ... penned in 
Sharks ... Martin Brody'd 
Stars ... collapsed into a black hole
Coyotes ... hit by giant Acme anvil dropped by a roadrunner
Kings ... abdicated 
Flames ... extinguished
Canucks ... deported to the US
Capitals ... lower-cased
Blues ... seeing red
Oilers ... green-energy'd 
Penguins ... iced
Panthers ... declawed
Predators ... Chris Hansen'd
Wild ... urbanized
Maple Leafs ... raked into a pile in the backyard and set on fire
Jets ... meet Stinger missile 
Hurricanes ... de-eyed
Bruins ... euthanized for rummaging trash cans 
Avalanche ... fallen 
Golden Knights ... tarnished 
Islanders ... beached

Canadiens ... Anglicized

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