MafiaMan

Is the word "chicken" similarly offensive? What about "clown"? Or "weasel"?

Whoa whoa whoa whoa. What exactly are you inferring by your use of the word 'monkey'? The school I really liked was Carthage College removing a feather from it's "C" and calling themselves the Red Men instead of Redmen and having sensitivity training to ensure that students and faculty know there is NO association with Native American imagery. What a crock.

I hear there's a lot of rumors going on so I wanted to make sure you all know...yes, the truth is, Phil Kessel is turning pro...

Just for the record, here was the "old" football helmet. Clearly, even the the casual fan can see how much more offensive this is than the Florida State Seminoles helmet.

My critique: Politically correct: Check Meaningless symbol sure to offend no one: Check Pointless name such as Sun, Fever, Shock, Heat, Miracle, or Magic: Check Overall grade: A+

In one of several odd tests conducted by their organization, the New York Islanders observe Phil Kessel as he passes with flying colors the most difficult test of all at the recent NHL combine...the old pouring milk up your nostril and squirting it out your eye trick!

Hammy from GopherPuckLive reacts to the news of Kessel's departure from the 'U'...

Sheesh, Craig, I know he said that Kessel is better than Parise, but, cmon...did you have to rip his tongue out?

Zach would WAIL on Phil...say it, Claude, and I'll stop punching you!

Here's a little someting ve call "Phil's Gone!". Hit it, fellas...a vun, a two, a vun two tree...

Now that Phil's gone pro, what are we gonna do? The only thing we can...TOGA!

What can I say? I'm a lonely guy on a Saturday night... 'Dis is Hanz... And dis is Phil... And ve're here to...pump...you up!

All I know is that if Bruce Dickinson says we need more Kessel...we should probably give him more Kessel!

Wow, Phil, is that a REAL national championship ring on your finger? Well, no. But I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night!

While Madison parties it up, some local Gopher hockey...uh..."boost-ahs" try to...uh..."convince" da latest and greatest hockey recruits in the Twin Cities dat da right ting ta do is...uh..."attend" da University of Minnesota...or else someone could get whacked...if ya catch my drift.

New Boston teammates Zdeno Chara and Phil Kessel try on the latest Reebok "swift" hockey jerseys and new-and-improved concussion-resistant helmets designed by Nike...

Slave...you will remove your mask and reveal your name to me. My name is Maximus Phillus Kesselus...

You're dangerous, Maverick! Too dangerous! Oh yea, Iceman? Well...Phil Kessel still sucks!

The Kessel family, however, remains supportive of their son's decision. "I'll release a statement as soon I get out of the hot tub," his mother was quoted as saying.

"Family friend" Glen Sonmor was absolutely IRATE over Phil's decision to turn pro... "I'm not shaving my beard until the puck drops against Maine!"

Members of the Boston Bruins pose for a photo during their recent charity golf event...

I told you we could be friends, FIRE HELMET GUY!

Wait a second...I think two years ago, the Sioux were considered a major disappointment by many UNTIL the great Frozen Four run. As for last season, with GF hosting a regional, people EXPECTED the Sioux to at least make a second consecutive trip to the Frozen Four. By the way, according to sources, it's spelled 'MacNaughton'. Don't be a homer. With the "best college hockey arena in the world" and the fact that UND's most-recent title is now seven years old, I'd say more pressure is on UND to win a title than Minnesota.

Unlike the 2002 NCAA championship riots, the U of M campus remained relatively calm after the announcement of Phil Kessel's departure to the Boston Bruins...

Meanwhile, the Gopher recruiting class of 2006-07 got together today to discuss the upcoming season... ...while the cheerleaders worked on some new moves...