thread is in need of hunting do humor.
New diet
I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dog, Schatzi, and
was in line to check out.
The woman behind me asked if I had a dog......Duh!!
I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her NO. I was
starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended
up in the hospital the last time, but that I'd lost 50 lbs. before I'd
awakened in the intensive care unit with tubes coming out most of my
orifices and IV's in both arms. Her eyes bugged out of her head. I
went on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it. I told her
that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to
load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two
every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again.
Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and
was that why I ended up in the hospital.
I said no.... I'd been sitting in the middle of the street licking my
a$$ when a car hit me.