UNDErmines

I don't know if commonness was the reason, but there are a fair number of past and present roughrider teams. http://mascotdb.com/displaymatches.php?mascotoperand=equals&mascot=Roughriders#.VUhOD_lVgSU. My guess is that the CFL team probably doomed that name for UND.

It's not my list. It's THE list, and Nokotas isn't on it. Whatever a Nokota is, it's no longer in the running. And why am I here promoting the honorable ermine? Because I care, that's why. I want to be able to look toward the top of the NCAA map and see a fierce and proud mascot staring back. I want to walk the streets of New York and Los Angeles and Omaha and see a person wearing a green and white UNDermines sweatshirt with pride. I want to see an 8-foot pure white mascot named the tERMINEator wandering your sidelines, exhorting the crowd to victory over gophers and badgers and other quadrupeds. I'm not here for me. I'm not here for you. I'm not even here for the ermines. I'm here to mediate the perfect marriage of school and symbol, the perfect representation of the North Dakota experience. The ermine was here long before man and will be here long after, living off the land, thriving in the depths of winter, and overcoming all obstacles. The ermine is the metaphor for both man's experience in North Dakota, exploring and battling the wild, and for the primeval world before man. As much as the ermine differs from us, the ermine is us. As John F. Kennedy once said, "Ich bin ein Erminer."

When I look at this list, I suspect that there'll be three or four finalists. One will be an animal, one will be weather-related, and one will be settler/pioneer-related. If you were picking the top one from each category, which would you suggest? Here are my suggestions: Animals - Ermine, and it's not even close. We all understand that, right? Pronghorns could be a distant second. There are no known Ermine mascots and 6 known Pronghorns, but only 1 college and 1 high school are active. Concepts - Every one of those suggestions is lame and trite. It seems like the locals like 'Nodaks', but as an outsider I'll tell you that it won't play well outside the local community. Weather - I like Northern Lights, but is that really a North Dakota thing? I've never visited your fine state. I had to look up 'sundogs', and it's clever but nobody outside the state will have any idea what it is. They'll just assume it's a cartoon dog. Anything associated with bad weather is going to be nixed immediately. There are 2 high schools with "Northern Lights" mascots. There are 4 sundogs, but only 1 (a high school) is active. North Stars is cool, but come on - don't just rip off a Minnesota name. Settler/Pioneer - I actually kind of like Homesteaders and there are no known mascots with that name. Farming - Sodbusters is the best of the lot and there are no known sodbuster mascots (surprisingly). Flight - These are all way too common to be considered. Just mark them off your list now. Oil - Are these really serious options? Roughnecks is okay, I guess, but it's too common. There are several teams with that mascot. People - The two nordic names are a political no go, but Frost Giants is actually really, really cool and no other team has it. If I'm on the committee, the finalists will be: Ermines - Meets every criterion easily. I keep preaching this, but it's true. Northern Lights - Meets all criteria except the ease of a mascot. And seriously, do you get northern lights? Homesteaders - Maybe not the most glamorous, but it meets every criteria. Would certainly be less marketable than the others. Frost Giants - Meets every criterion easily, though its fatal flaw may be that it'll get shortened to "Giants", which is way too common. These four stand out.

Now, if we classify those common suggestion into themes, what do we have? Animals Dragons Ermines Flickertails Mallards Meadowlarks Nighthawks Predators Pronghorns Raptors Rattlers Snowy Owls Stallions Concepts Big Green Fire Flame(s) Force Green Machine Legends Nodaks North Dakota Pride Spirit Weather/Outdoors Blizzard Flood North Stars Northern Lights Stars Storm Sundogs Tundra Wind Settler/Pioneer Themes Badlanders Explorers Homesteaders Hunters Settlers Trappers Farming Fighting Farmers Reapers Sodbusters Thrashers (Shouldn't it actually be Threshers?) Flight themes: Aeros Aviators Pilots Oil or Industry Drillers Frackers Roughnecks People Frost Giants Nordics Norse Suggestions That Have No Chance Because They Are Too Controversial or Violent Bombers Cavalry Dakota Dakotans Fighting Dakotans Fighting Warriors Outlaws Warriors Warriors of the North Suggestions That Have No Chance Because They're Weird or They're Blatantly Associated With Something Else Berserkers Blackhawks Kodiaks Paratas Polar Bears Tomahawks Trailblazers Tsunami Yeti

Okay, I took a look. Now, this is a public input process and not a vote, so it's certainly possible that one person could submit one suggestion that wins it all. But if you look at general support and consider primarily the names that got 10 or more suggestions, you end up with this list: Aeros Aviators Badlanders Berserkers Big Green Blackhawks Blizzard Bombers Cavalry Dakota Dakotans Dragons Drillers Ermines Explorers Fighting Dakotans Fighting Farmers Fighting Warriors Fire Flame Flames Flickertails Flood Force Frackers Frost Giants Green Machine Homesteaders Hunters Kodiaks Legends Mallards Meadowlarks Nighthawks Nodaks Nordics Norse North Dakota North Stars Northern Lights Outlaws Paratas Pilots Polar Bears Predators Pride Pronghorns Raptors Rattlers Reapers Roughnecks Settlers Snowy Owls Sodbusters Spirit Stallions Stars Storm Sundogs Thrashers Tomahawks Trailblazers Trappers Tsunami Tundra Warriors Warriors of the North Wind Yeti

I may have to go cybersquat.

It appears that the lovable yet ferocious ermine was submitted a total of 60 times. I'm pretty sure that I'm no more than 10 of those. So there are a lot of savvy and intelligent North Dakotans out there. I'm telling you, people. Go set up the forum.erminesport.com domain, because it's going to happen. It just makes too much sense.

Wait a minute. I think I'm figuring this out. It looks like the non-consideration list excludes the following: Smart-alecky suggestions Names that they know they won't select (You know, like "Fighting Sioux" and "Sioux") Some semi-random selection of duplicate suggestions (which may be something like suggestions coming from the same IP address) I think the consideration list includes everything that's still alive. And do you know what that means? Ermines are still alive! (Oh, and if the committee is reading this, I apologize about that clown show comment. Y'all are awesome. You're great. If you were animals, you would be ermines.)

It looks like the second list is the suggestions that were submitted, and the first list is the ones that were unfairly and unscientifically eliminated from consideration due to a complete lack of knowledge about ermine.

What the - what kind of rubber-nosed, floppy-shoed committee was behind this? This is a travesty! THERE IS NO JUSTICE! I don't care what they pick. UND is going to be the Ermines in my book forever.

I'll offer up a few thoughts about the process. I'm not an insider on this, but I've done other market research projects as a research consultant on some university name changes and other branding work. Others are free to disagree, but here's how I see the process going. 1. Overall, the committee has some reasonable scoring criteria, and they'll go through the suggestions and score them. There's a lot of room for personal bias in that process, but that's unavoidable. 2. In their scoring, they're going to kick out anything that's in the least bit controversial. At all. In anyone's mind. This means nothing Native American, nothing that's overly white, and probably nothing that relates to people at all. (If you're a Pilot or a Pioneer or whatever, you still have to assign a race to the mascot and no one wants to do that.) New team names are really big on concepts and inanimate objects these days - Oklahoma City Thunder, Colorado Avalanche, etc. - and animals are always easy. Concepts and animals can't complain. Uniqueness should be important to them, so I bet if you look at this list, anything that shows up more than 10 times on a current team will be eliminated: http://www.mascotdb.com/browse.php?page=M2#.VUfC3vlVgSV 3. In their scoring, they're going to kill anything that's divisive. If two large factions are each pushing for different names, they're both probably going to be eliminated unless one has some large donors attached to it. 4. It would be fun to look at the results if they'll release that scoring, but I doubt they will. They can only pick 3 to 5 finalists, and I'm sure there'll be 20 names that score well. People will complain if their choice missed the finals by one vote, so the conservative approach is to not release anything. I'm not sure I agree with that approach, because I think it could help people understand the process and buy into it. But the conservative approach will be to not release it. 5. At this point, they should do research to test the names. Ideally, you'll do this with six audiences, in decreasing order of priority: large donors or funders, alumni, general market population, staff and faculty, national or regional audience, and current students. What they'll be looking for is: - large donors or funders (which may include state legislators) - Do any of the names turn them off so much that it'll affect funding? - alumni - The simple truth is that alumni will hate everything. That's true of any college name change. People don't like losing their history, and it makes them feel old. So you're trying to find something that they're most likely to begrudgingly accept and least likely to affect alumni donations. - general market population - This is the main source of new students, and the main market for buying stuff. I'm not a Dakotan, so I don't know if it's the whole state, part of the state, or some other geographic definition. For this group you want to see what people like, and you're less concerned about what they hate. Because the people who like it are the ones who'll buy stuff. - staff and faculty - presumably this audience knows that the current name can't stand, so they're on board with the change. You want to see what they like in order to keep them as flag-wavers of the brand, and eliminate options that they hate. - national or regional audience. You might test with this audience just to see if anything is lightning in a bottle, and if your finalists include something that's completely regional (e.g., Nodaks, whatever that is), you want to be sure that it has no negative connotations in other parts of the country and see if it's something that resonates at all. - current students. Current students are future alumni, and the only difference is time. They're going to hate every suggestion, so the goal is really to figure out if any of the finalists will make them tip over cars and seize the student union. Secondarily, you want to see if there are options that have significant support. 6. Ideally, they would mock up some logos and collateral as part of Step 5, but budget might limit that. If so, then they'll pick a finalist and come up with some logo designs. 7. Then as a bone for alumni and students, they'll hold an internal process with those groups to select a final logo. There may be some more testing here similar to Step 5, but it'll be lower key.

While I certainly agree about transparency, one challenge is the process that is being used. It's not a scientific process, but rather a public input process. It's not representative of public opinion or any other group, so you wouldn't want people to conclude that a particular name is better just because it got the most suggestions. That's how Time Magazine ended up with Ataturk and South Park's Cartman duking it out in the voting for Man of the Century back in 2000. http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1997-11-07/news/9711080164_1_mustafa-kemal-ataturk-founder-of-modern-turkey-national-hero. The number of suggestions is meaningless in the current process - the key is the quality of the suggestions relative to their selection criteria. A better approach would be to list each suggestion that was made and the scoring according to their criteria. They should be able to defend the scoring and it would be very interesting to see. I would hope that they'll then identify 3 to 5 suggestions that score well according to their criteria and go out and do real research (not pseudoresearch with a marketing firm, but with an actual research firm). You measure both support and opposition among several groups: current students, alumni, the local community, the state, and perhaps even the nation. You then pick the name that offers the best combination of good support and lukewarm opposition. If they really wanted to be airtight, perhaps you then take the top two candidates and do a public random drawing. I've never seen it done, but that would be a cool thing to do.

I'm actually quite sincere about the ermine name. (Actually, weasels would be cool too, but it's got an unfair negative context sometimes. Weasels are linked to wisdom and courage in old mythology, but they suffer the slights of cartoonists these days.) In contrast, ermines are linked to royalty. They're beautiful creatures, and they're fearsome to boot. Non-sports fans will love the Ermine mascot for its appearance and uniqueness, and it's a very versatile and unifying mascot for sports fans. People will buy Ermines gear just because it's cool, which will have great value to the University. And we shouldn't underestimate uniqueness. This person built a database of team mascots, and Ermines don't appear at all despite their positive features for a mascot: http://mascotdb.com/browse.php#.VUURWflVgSV. There are literally 50 teams called the Pilots already, and 8 other North Stars. That's HUGE in terms of marketing value. Look at the Banana Slugs - everyone knows the banana slugs and they even got a free multi-million dollar callout in Pulp Fiction. And banana slugs aren't adorable, furry, killers with eyes that project a desire to attack and terrorize. The challenge for the decision makers is that they can pick some generic name that's commonly used (e.g., Pilots or Warriors or whatever - North Stars is better but still not unique) and people will eventually accept it and move on, and UND will be known for it in North Dakota and nowhere else. Or they can make a bold statement that projects something unique about North Dakota, but it's not the "safe" choice internally at first. Boldness requires taking risks, and that's not done much these days. But it pays off. And Ermines will pay off.

The initial mystery is part of the allure, am I right? You're intrigued, you're curious, you're thinking, "What is this thing called an ermine?" And then you look it up and see a furry and adorable ball of terror that is pound for pound one of the most terrifying creatures on this big blue ball that we call earth.

Admittedly, it won't appeal to everybody in the first five seconds. It takes a good ten seconds of thought to recognize the power of the Ermine name, and then one becomes an Ermine supporter for life.

We could probably work with it. Maybe it could be an Ermine with a headdress.

Okay, the suggestion period is closed, and they've published the scoring criteria. Here's how I would rate the Ermines nickname. I think it should win in a fair fight. The way I see the scoring for Ermines is: 1. Be unique, recognizable, inspiring and distinctly UND’s Clearly a +1 and I don't see how it's not the top option. 2. Promote a sense of pride, strength, fierceness, and passion Clearly a +1 3. Be representative of the state and region in a way that honors the traditions and heritage of the past but also looks to the future. Certainly meets the first part. Looking forward is tough, but in an age of conservation and ecological awareness, Ermines works. I think it's a +1, but a skeptic might give it a 0. 4. Be a unifying and rallying symbol I'm not sure how you decide this without research, but I think its uniqueness works for this. I'd give it a +1. 5. Ease of Depicting/Personifying Physical Mascot: 1 - Easy; mascot and fans can easily dress as nickname, e.g. Vikings, Lumberjacks 0 - Moderate; easy to depict graphically and create physical mascot, however fan participation more difficult, e.g. Eagles, Bears -1 - Difficult; challenging to depict graphically and physically, e.g. Vandals, Tarheels Clearly a +1 and it's hard to imagine it not being the top choice based on other suggestions I've heard. 6. Cheer/Battle Cry Considerations: 1 - “Built-in” cheer, battle cry, e.g. Spartans, Wildcats 0 - More difficult, e.g. Cornhuskers, Lumberjacks -1 - Difficult, e.g. Vandals, Tarheels I have no idea how to judge this for any mascot. Why is a Vandal difficult while a Spartan isn't? If they're just looking for recognizable nouns, Ermines is clearly a +1. 7. Meaning of Nickname: 1 - Obvious, e.g. Eagles, Grizzlies 0 - Moderate, e.g. Vandals, Cornhuskers -1 - Requires explanation, e.g. Sooners, Hoosiers Should be a +1. Maybe some uneducated people would give it a 0, but come on. It's a mammal. We learn mammals in 5th grade. 8. Linguistic Considerations – Pronunciation: 1 - Easy, e.g. Lumberjacks, Thunderbirds 0 - Moderate, e.g. Hoyas, Zias -1 - Difficult, e.g. Chanticleers, Gaels Again, we learn mammals in 5th grade. This should be easy. But based on the examples I could see it being a 0 and a critical person might give it a -1. 9. Linguistic Considerations – Likelihood of name being abridged resulting in different name or name similar to existing name: 1 - Not likely or not possible, e.g. Bears, Eagles 0 - Possible, e.g. Thunderbirds to ‘Birds,” Bobcats to “Cats” -1 - Likely, e.g. Catamounts to “Cats,” Chanticleers to “Chants” It can't really be shortened, but I could see some heathen opponents using the "vermin" rhyme. This is probably the only weakness of the name, so this might be a -1. But any name is going to be co-opted by opponents. , Faiders, Donkey, Dolts ... it's going to happen to any name. Every name will be a -1 if we're scoring based on those criteria.

Okay, all of the cool kids are making a final-day push for Ermines. Going with Ermines will be the best marketing idea the school has ever had. It's unique, it's identifiable to North Dakota, it's both fierce and adorable, and it's above any potential criticism. How can you not like a logo with these possibilities? ERMINES! Go suggest it now. Do it.

So have we settled on Ermines as the choice? It's an awesome name and it would also represent a fresh start that everyone can support.

Okay, we need a big final push for ermines or UND will get stuck with some terrible generic name like "UND Competitive Student Athletes" or "UND Legal Residents of Dakota". I hope people are going to the web site to prod the committee.

As a compromise, I could also go with Thunder Ermines or War Ermines, though I don't think the adjectives are necessary. Ermines are ferocious enough as a lone noun.

Okay, here's an edited version. I agree that it makes a much more compelling case. We need a mascot that is native to North Dakota - the ermine is native to North Dakota We need a mascot that is (at least somewhat) unique to North Dakota - the ermine's range is very limited in the U.S. We need a mascot that is fierce but marketable - the ermine is a fierce predator while also being highly charming visually We need a mascot that works with green and white - ermine are white, at least in winter We need a mascot that is unique and recognizable - as far as I can tell, there's no other team called the ermines

It's because most states don't have ermine. Look at this face and imagine it painted on top of a football helmet, staring at you from the other side of the line of scrimmage. It would terrify opponents.

Now close your eyes and imagine an Ermine carrying a warhammer. It would be amazing. UND would become the most recognizable program in the nation.

It would be impossible to find a better reflection of North Dakota.