Well, well, well...how cute. Cute little discussion board. Cute little Alabama jokes. Cute little arena that holds your cute little cheerleaders, I mean, defense. As the fans of the poorer team always do, you are avoiding the topic at hand--FOOTBALL!!! What a concept! NOT women's basketball, NOT ice-fishing, and NOT hockey. Were you serious when you showed those hockey banners?!?! I wouldn't use those things for toilet paper!
In case you forgot, we were talking about a football game this Saturday. Let's look at the FACTS:
1. UND is awful. Your defense gives up 20 points per game!!! Hello??? Is this thing on? 20!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Perhaps you forgot to field a defense during a few of those games. Perhaps they were outside of your cozy little arena shoveling snow or feeding their sled dogs. NOTE TO UND: Remind your defense to come to Alerus Center this Saturday at 1 pm. Since the NCAA is into bending rules, maybe they will let you field 12 or 13 players on defense. That would even things up nicely.
2. The magic word for the University of North Dakota football team is BARELY. You BARELY beat St. Cloud. You BARELY beat South Dakota State. You BARELY beat NDSU. You BARELY beat Nebraska-Omaha. And you BARELY beat Winona State. I'm not sure if you are aware of the laws of probability, but YOUR LUCK IS RUNNING OUT! You will like that word "BARELY" this Saturday when you BARELY score a point, BARELY hold UNA under 50 points, and NOT-SO-BARELY miss the chance to win another national championship.
A school with 13,000+ students can only bring 7,200 fans to a playoff quarter-final game? Are you kidding me? UNA (with 5,500 students) brought 9,500 fans last weekend. Are you people even proud of your team??? Your stadium is more sparsely populated than your desolate state.
As UNAFan05 mentioned, I want to invite each of you to watch ESPN on December 13. Your defense will probably be outside ice-skating together, BUT call them in, sit them down, and make them watch the game. Better yet, give them all note pads so they can take notes.
Do you realize that you have invited Will Harlon Hall to Grand Forks, North Dakota. DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE!?!?! You just don't understand do you? Well, you will young bison-wannabe's, you will. Keep up the Alabama jokes. You better get all of them in while you can. Your poor little "BARELY" season is coming to a dreadful, embarrassing end. Sorry...